I punch the double doors wide open with my two open palms, not letting the weight cut into my arrogant, heel digging haughty stride into the room. Threw off my tan/chestnut leather aviator jacket - left or right? Didnt matter. I just threw it hard. The casters on the aged leather highback chair creaked like many a door before in those b-grade slasher flicks just before some hapless half-naked sorority girl got turned into a colander by a generic masked psycho. I can literally feel the bile coarsing through my fingers. Ironic, how fiery spite and vitriol conveys physically into such an icy tingle.
Fuyoooooo drama or not? Haha Salman Rushdie - go back play play with your trophy wife only laaa....no need to write anymore.
Well thats just how i roughly feel at the moment , getting back into my blog after almost a month of nothing and having soooo much to rant about - with a skosh of film noir and other typically poignant cliches.
First rant? Hmmn its going to be tough without going into specifics. Its the story of the setan betina haram mulut laser - i'm sure those of you who know the story shared a good laugh with me about it. NaaAAbei some people got fantastic imagination mann.....come up with incredible story that flew on the swift wings of gossip all the way to london. Make me stress for fucks only. Nasib baik all the people who mattered knew better. Please lah - we've been doing london for the better part of 4 years....and not like you got much credibility left anyway. Save it on gossiping about people with reputations you can actually scuff la. Membising jerr...
Moving on, Mnite, Msoc.
Decided to re-run for Cultural Officer at the veryyyy last minute at the agm like....2+weeks ago. Made a pig's breakfast of my hastily improvised speech so gerenti hanchur already la. Dahlah tu teruk - hardly any second years showed up, 1st year votes were torn left right center, and the seniors didn't like me very much, duuuh. Wasn't particularly bitter, cos it was a huge weight off my back, and i could easily do more than i did for last year's mnite without even having the post. The new COs -( lets call 'im CO #1 for references' sake) a 2nd year English dude who's a theatre major or something whose qualifiers were a solid theater background ( OBviously) and a gap year spent teaching kids in sar-rare-wark english (eHuk eHuk) & #2, a malay girl who seems like she knows her stuff but made quite an impressive speech. (More on Msoc commitee's past and present later)
So anyway a bit pelik kan , a foreigner as cultural sec. Not being racist or anything, but it juuuust doesn't feel all that right kan? -especially if you're gonna be putting together cultural performances from a multi cultural origin etc etc etc. But he seems to really know his shit so kasi can la...in the spirit of cultural open-mindedness etc.
eEEETt wrong! He announced his idea for the play today at the screening of last year's mnite. He intends to do The Fall of the House of Usher. Those of you who know the story, or at least know the general vein of Edgar Allan Poe's works should be hearing alarm bells. Dark, morbid, depressing stories. Especially this one. I can just see whichever Malaysian VIP storming off in a huff in disagreement with the plays central theme of incest and a bizzare sibling relationship. Just like that LSE msoc/singsoc thing a coupla years back where the play poked at some sensitive malaysia-singapore issues.
Weirdly enough, most of the room seemed quite entranced when he went on about how there was going to be background dancers to portray the haunting of the house, and the use of face painting and elaborate costumes to further portray the twisting madness of the siblings. Later on he said something else about bringing in more warwick theatre people in - well the play only has 3 central roles. HMmmn.....
Don't get me wrong - i'd love to see a classic Poe fleshed out with contemporary theatrics and i do believe this guy can pull this off, BUT i'd love to catch it at a Dram Soc thingy...or the Arts center - not a Malaysian Night. An Mnite should engage the audience and allow them to identify at some level with the characters or story. An Mnite should be about Malaysian culture - society, song or dance. After the generally blase review of last year's play - a piece on stereotypes with an interesting premise but with one too many twists at the end - its obvious that most of an Mnite audience come to be entertained with something they can relate to. Not Shakespeare, not Poe, not Chekov (unless done in an original-besmirching manglish infused zany malaysian style).
So how, CO # 2? still think i should choreograph Bole Chudiyan? Can probably fit in when Madeline 'dies' ...or before the house physically splits in half. Take your pick.
Back to MSA's agm - there was this big hooha about allowing non-malaysians to run for commitee positions, more cos a bruneian was running for pres rather than that guy running for CO. After some big hooha about not being able to find a hard OR soft copy of the constitution, and several clumsily worded majority motions, they finally settled on all the positions being open to non-malaysian members save for the president. Blah blah blah figurehead blah blah blah. Not like our last president was a freakin bastion of leadership and charm. Naaaabeh. Typical skema spineless politician. Actually i dont really have a bone to pick with last year's comm. Except for that little niggle with the prez being a spineless, charmless gorm, and two bitches who chose to personally butt heads with me. Lets go back in time to last year, around mnite
*cheesy chimes sound effect and blur swirl effect*
Bitch A - kejap nak buat this performance, kejap nak buat that dance. cannot decide. Very irritating when i had to confirm numbers and formations. And then sommore nak sibuk sibuk kejap suggest some lameass dikir moves, and then suggest that new move. She can oh do eeEEverything except choose a dance, and do her job properly as props manager. In the end i had to go with some of the dancers to carik constumes and everything. She very smart dah i settle all that at the expense of 2 solid days of sleep she tried and get smart with me. I let her have it there and then sampai lari keluar nangis. Padan muka. Cue a minor ripple of applause from her underlings and other random ppl who thought she was an annoying bitch as well.
Bitch B - also one itchy monkey who cannot stay on her own job as treasurer. Loves to order other comm members around to do random shit. Sibuk sibuk here, sibuk sibuk there. One sterling moment was when i drew silouhettes of the stereotypes in the play to be used for the promo posters and websites - handed them to one of the comm members to setel with the other ppl in charge of the posters. Someeehow the skanky bitch intercepted it, made her own lamer versions and outta the fucking blue the next day i saw the posters with her versions on 'em. And she claimed the whole silouhette thing was her idea. Im sure other comm members have a similar bone to pick with her. To this day when i see her skinny ass in the gym i pray that she falls flat on her face on the treadmill until her already flat face flat sommore. Muka dahlah cam siall.
Think or KNOW you're one of the fuckers i'm blogging about? Well taking a line from the oh so hilarious God-King of Bengs, "Rockson Takumi Tan" -
FUCK YOU UNDERSTAAAND!!
Ahh it feels nice to be back in the " I don't give a damn what you twatheads think anymore" mood. Theres just no point killing yourself being nice to certain people.
Eh i continue next time la - dahlah kesian you all read so long. Sommore i pun dah ngantuk giler nih. Next entry - more malaysian rants, and more thoughts of Amar. Oh yeah and it'll be sooon!
This is MY blog. MY thoughts. MY release. MY therapy. Dont like? Go paint yourself grey and lie down on the fuckin NKVE - or Gibbett Hill Road...mana mana jelar.
Fuyoooooo drama or not? Haha Salman Rushdie - go back play play with your trophy wife only laaa....no need to write anymore.
Well thats just how i roughly feel at the moment , getting back into my blog after almost a month of nothing and having soooo much to rant about - with a skosh of film noir and other typically poignant cliches.
First rant? Hmmn its going to be tough without going into specifics. Its the story of the setan betina haram mulut laser - i'm sure those of you who know the story shared a good laugh with me about it. NaaAAbei some people got fantastic imagination mann.....come up with incredible story that flew on the swift wings of gossip all the way to london. Make me stress for fucks only. Nasib baik all the people who mattered knew better. Please lah - we've been doing london for the better part of 4 years....and not like you got much credibility left anyway. Save it on gossiping about people with reputations you can actually scuff la. Membising jerr...
Moving on, Mnite, Msoc.
Decided to re-run for Cultural Officer at the veryyyy last minute at the agm like....2+weeks ago. Made a pig's breakfast of my hastily improvised speech so gerenti hanchur already la. Dahlah tu teruk - hardly any second years showed up, 1st year votes were torn left right center, and the seniors didn't like me very much, duuuh. Wasn't particularly bitter, cos it was a huge weight off my back, and i could easily do more than i did for last year's mnite without even having the post. The new COs -( lets call 'im CO #1 for references' sake) a 2nd year English dude who's a theatre major or something whose qualifiers were a solid theater background ( OBviously) and a gap year spent teaching kids in sar-rare-wark english (eHuk eHuk) & #2, a malay girl who seems like she knows her stuff but made quite an impressive speech. (More on Msoc commitee's past and present later)
So anyway a bit pelik kan , a foreigner as cultural sec. Not being racist or anything, but it juuuust doesn't feel all that right kan? -especially if you're gonna be putting together cultural performances from a multi cultural origin etc etc etc. But he seems to really know his shit so kasi can la...in the spirit of cultural open-mindedness etc.
eEEETt wrong! He announced his idea for the play today at the screening of last year's mnite. He intends to do The Fall of the House of Usher. Those of you who know the story, or at least know the general vein of Edgar Allan Poe's works should be hearing alarm bells. Dark, morbid, depressing stories. Especially this one. I can just see whichever Malaysian VIP storming off in a huff in disagreement with the plays central theme of incest and a bizzare sibling relationship. Just like that LSE msoc/singsoc thing a coupla years back where the play poked at some sensitive malaysia-singapore issues.
Weirdly enough, most of the room seemed quite entranced when he went on about how there was going to be background dancers to portray the haunting of the house, and the use of face painting and elaborate costumes to further portray the twisting madness of the siblings. Later on he said something else about bringing in more warwick theatre people in - well the play only has 3 central roles. HMmmn.....
Don't get me wrong - i'd love to see a classic Poe fleshed out with contemporary theatrics and i do believe this guy can pull this off, BUT i'd love to catch it at a Dram Soc thingy...or the Arts center - not a Malaysian Night. An Mnite should engage the audience and allow them to identify at some level with the characters or story. An Mnite should be about Malaysian culture - society, song or dance. After the generally blase review of last year's play - a piece on stereotypes with an interesting premise but with one too many twists at the end - its obvious that most of an Mnite audience come to be entertained with something they can relate to. Not Shakespeare, not Poe, not Chekov (unless done in an original-besmirching manglish infused zany malaysian style).
So how, CO # 2? still think i should choreograph Bole Chudiyan? Can probably fit in when Madeline 'dies' ...or before the house physically splits in half. Take your pick.
Back to MSA's agm - there was this big hooha about allowing non-malaysians to run for commitee positions, more cos a bruneian was running for pres rather than that guy running for CO. After some big hooha about not being able to find a hard OR soft copy of the constitution, and several clumsily worded majority motions, they finally settled on all the positions being open to non-malaysian members save for the president. Blah blah blah figurehead blah blah blah. Not like our last president was a freakin bastion of leadership and charm. Naaaabeh. Typical skema spineless politician. Actually i dont really have a bone to pick with last year's comm. Except for that little niggle with the prez being a spineless, charmless gorm, and two bitches who chose to personally butt heads with me. Lets go back in time to last year, around mnite
*cheesy chimes sound effect and blur swirl effect*
Bitch A - kejap nak buat this performance, kejap nak buat that dance. cannot decide. Very irritating when i had to confirm numbers and formations. And then sommore nak sibuk sibuk kejap suggest some lameass dikir moves, and then suggest that new move. She can oh do eeEEverything except choose a dance, and do her job properly as props manager. In the end i had to go with some of the dancers to carik constumes and everything. She very smart dah i settle all that at the expense of 2 solid days of sleep she tried and get smart with me. I let her have it there and then sampai lari keluar nangis. Padan muka. Cue a minor ripple of applause from her underlings and other random ppl who thought she was an annoying bitch as well.
Bitch B - also one itchy monkey who cannot stay on her own job as treasurer. Loves to order other comm members around to do random shit. Sibuk sibuk here, sibuk sibuk there. One sterling moment was when i drew silouhettes of the stereotypes in the play to be used for the promo posters and websites - handed them to one of the comm members to setel with the other ppl in charge of the posters. Someeehow the skanky bitch intercepted it, made her own lamer versions and outta the fucking blue the next day i saw the posters with her versions on 'em. And she claimed the whole silouhette thing was her idea. Im sure other comm members have a similar bone to pick with her. To this day when i see her skinny ass in the gym i pray that she falls flat on her face on the treadmill until her already flat face flat sommore. Muka dahlah cam siall.
Think or KNOW you're one of the fuckers i'm blogging about? Well taking a line from the oh so hilarious God-King of Bengs, "Rockson Takumi Tan" -
FUCK YOU UNDERSTAAAND!!
Ahh it feels nice to be back in the " I don't give a damn what you twatheads think anymore" mood. Theres just no point killing yourself being nice to certain people.
Eh i continue next time la - dahlah kesian you all read so long. Sommore i pun dah ngantuk giler nih. Next entry - more malaysian rants, and more thoughts of Amar. Oh yeah and it'll be sooon!
This is MY blog. MY thoughts. MY release. MY therapy. Dont like? Go paint yourself grey and lie down on the fuckin NKVE - or Gibbett Hill Road...mana mana jelar.
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